Where to Look For Your Why

(Read in :03)“The two most important days in your life are the day you were born, and the day you find out why.” ~Mark Twain

Yep, that’s one of my all-time favorites. I’m a quotes junkie and I guess that makes me a kind of sommelier of words. I absolutely swoon over a well-turned phrase. Samuel Langhorne Clemens possessed a depth of wisdom seldom seen. He was born in 1835 when Halley’s comet first streaked across the sky. And, it was elegantly fitting that he died when it made it’s rare 2nd visit in 1910. His life was filled with pain and sorrow. Despite that, he’ll always be remembered for his wry wit, humor, and insight. In many ways, his thinking was far ahead of his time.

The How of Finding Your Why

People often have no idea how to look for their purpose or where to find their why. In fact, the first question is often “how do I even start?” At that point, the seeker has already taken the first step without realizing it! Somewhere deep inside, they instinctively understand there is something they were uniquely created to do. The hunger to know our why is a natural part of our human nature.

When a person feels the pull and begins to search, they’re on their way to becoming the best possible version of the person they were created to be!

Three things you can do today

  • One of Matthew Kelly’s most consistent messages in his best-selling books like The Rhythm of Life or Perfectly Yourself is to “go within.” Spend a little time each day in what he calls “the classroom of silence.” It’s surprising how much insight we can gain by quieting our thoughts for just a few minutes a day! In the process, we need to be intentional about asking the bigger questions and listening to our inner voice. This is almost impossible to do without stepping away from the “noise” of our everyday life.
  • Take advantage of some of the many assessments available to help you analyze your traits and tendencies. StrengthsFinder, a Gallup product,  has been useful to thousands of people to help identify their strongest themes. Another one I particularly like is the VIA character strengths survey you can take online for free at http://www.viacharacter.org/. In about 10 minutes you can get a free report that will reveal your top five character strengths. If you want to go deeper, you can purchase additional reports with more details and suggested uses for your findings. There are many good tools available to help you begin your search.
  • Ask trusted friends or family members to describe the things they see in you that make you unique. They may not be as obvious to you as they are to others.  I found this on a website called liveyourlegend.net. “oftentimes we get so deep in our own thoughts and fears that we subconsciously blind ourselves from seeing the obvious. Instead of putting all the pressure on yourself, ask the people who know you best. Sometimes the honest perspective of an outsider is all we need to finally see the light that’s been shining the whole time.”

If you have questions please reach out to us. We’ll help get you pointed in the right direction!

“If you can’t figure out your purpose, figure out your passion. Your passion will lead you right into your purpose.” ~ Bishop T.D. Jakes


  • Grant Newbold

    Betty. Thanks again. I too suggest that StrengthsFinder can be helpful. To access it our subscribers can simply go to Amazon Books and order StrengthsFinder 2.0 for $13. So they send you the book and with it comes a one time code to go online and complete the extensive questionnaire that then generates your profile. Very good stuff for each of us to know about ourselves. My only caution about using assessments is that it sometimes looks like our traits are carved in stone rather than attributes that we can apply and strengthen and it looks like our weaknesses are unchangeable. If you find yourself saying “Oh well thats just the way I am” then in my opinion you have bought in to the permanence of traits too completely. I have heard that statement of “thats just the way I am” too many times when doing therapy with people and it triggers a very negative reaction for me because it comes across as a lame excuse for not addressing our weaknesses and not being willing to do the work required to “Become Your Best.” Thanks again. Doc Newbold

    • Betty Streff

      All the tools out there are only meant as guides and a place to begin. I agree. Steven Covey always cautioned about arguing for one’s weaknesses. I agree that “well that’s just the way I am” rankles me because it suggests we are not able to change or improve. The most important thing to do is to listen to one’s life and look back at the things that produce meaning. We’ll get into that in future posts or can discuss with individuals one on one. Thanks for your input!

Leave a Comment or Question